Tear at the
thatch, set it on fire! Call the rings of Saturn down through incantation and
despair. The sound is grating, a long low wail like that you’d expect of an
animal caught in a snare, the intervals between utterance lessening until there
is no interval at all but infinite continuation. I attempt to capture the
visual equivalent with charcoal on paper bags I carted here from the dump
specifically for this purpose, each attempt rounded at the top and exhibiting
tendencies to splinter at the edges, just as if I had modeled them on multi-cellular
organisms at the dawn of complexity, the very beginning of what we would come
to recognize as the blueprint for our own devious make up. Eulalie is striking
a bell or a bottle or something solid that rings as if it were hollow, calling
to the heavens to witness her grief. There is an enormous gulf between what we
see and what we allow ourselves to keep, what we store away in the memory like
grains. Trying to break through this habit, to untie it and roll it down the
hill, just makes us more susceptible and creates, in the end, the distinct
feeling that we have accomplished nothing whatsoever. We have simply been
standing in place before a mirror and gazing at the odd, isolated strands of
hair that jut out from the temple, that catch whatever draft is in the room and
amplify it. Mimic it the way the waves mimic the beach on which they will
shortly be extinguishing themselves. For my part, I never realized that others
thought it possible to make yourself somehow less than human by studying
navigation, by sharpening quills when you have a typewriter at hand. It was
balmy times, but venomous, the actual sun so far away as to seem like failed
conjecture, a promise made on two hands, only one of which, though, was
lacerated purposefully to produce the blood necessary for the ritual. Now the
bugle is packed up tight and Eulalie throws every other object she comes across
through what would have been a window in previous decades or millennia but is now
simply an orifice, a blank place in a wall that has crumbled some in the rain
and which you might want to write poems about if you were in the habit of
writing poems. If you were encouraged in your youth by those who didn’t understand
the potentially devastating consequences of what it was they were fobbing off
on you. The nights spent picking scabs on your arms. The prizes with names that
make one think of prairie flowers, of dens full of buzzing rattlesnakes.
and again, a good read, your fluidity of language and images - seems effortless, weightless, so the whole thing floats through the reading mind....
ReplyDeleteThanks, Rosaire. :)
ReplyDelete