The blades, made of wood and big
around as palm fronds, circulate the air so that the insects won’t gather above
our heads, won’t land on the cantaloupe and set its flesh to crawling. I place
my fingers on my temples and lean in, expecting at any moment to be recognized and
escorted unceremoniously from the building, which is in the shape of a star
with one end, one hallway, sharper, less elongated than the other, as if
gravity exerts itself more forcefully the closer you get to solid ground, or at
least ground that is still moist from the recent morning rains. Those who might
have seen my picture in the past, those who might even have taken it from a concealed
vantage point in the hedges across the street, have better things at the moment
to occupy their minds. Eulalie catches some unwanted attention by stretching
her legs out full length into the aisle way, pulling absently at what must be
her garter hidden by the hem of her skirt, and when I whisper something derogatory,
threatening, she rolls her eyes and says everything will be fine. The world and
everything in it will cease to exist someday soon because we will cease to
exist and what would be the purpose then of continuing to create and label objects?
What would be the use of songs lamenting one’s distance from home or with tambourines
drowning out the background singers who each dreamt of coming down front and
center (or so you read in a magazine article with a title you forget now, but
one that jumped out at you then in its prodigious black ink like an octopus)
and then gave up that dream when they realized it meant having to commit many
more words and phrases to memory and recalling them again at a moment’s notice.
Eulalie holds her hand out as if to impede the progress of someone who wishes
suddenly and for no apparent reason to get closer to her body, to stand next to
it in an effort to estimate its height or take from it whatever warmth might be
radiating from the skin. Trouble is, no one is actually advancing and the
gesture makes me think perhaps Eulalie has suffered some sort of nerve damage during
one of her countless strolls around the edge of the lake where fishermen’s
lures hang almost decoratively here and there from the tree branches and the
water itself grows murky and impenetrable to the gaze the further out you go.
This is typical, I’m told, of any body of water where the center is deeper than
the surrounding edges precisely because other ways of organizing it will fail
to hold the water in, thus disqualifying the body, by definition, as a lake. It
will send the water cascading over the edges every time it rains, flooding the
homes and the businesses -- the tire repair shops and the beauty parlors with their
primitively rendered parrots and the occasional cockatoo in the big bay windows
out front. And wouldn’t it be something if we could identify all such suspicious
topographies ahead of time and call attention to them the way we call attention
to ourselves? How many lives might we save? How many times would we get our names
mentioned in the geological journals that matter?
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